What's the biggest mindset shift you've seen separating the people who actually break through from the ones who stay stuck?
You know, Tony's really good at saying when people say, how long does it take to quit smoking?
People say, oh, it took me seven years to quit smoking.
Did it really take seven years, or did it take one second? It took seven years of thinking about quitting smoking,
and one second to go,
enough. It's over. I'm done.
There's a situation. There's a circumstance out of your control. You're in a job for fourteen years. You know it's robbing your soul. And for the last four, every morning you wake up and think to yourself,
I'm done with this job. I hate it, but you still go.
Two things could happen. One,
you go to this job you hate and they fire you.
You have no choice. Decisions have to be made. True? I have to make a decision. I have to do something different. I just got fired, and sometimes we get that blessing. Right, Amy? Where you go, that's a sign from God, the universe. I'm going to try my own thing.
Sometimes
decisions,
if you look at the biggest ones you make, you really didn't have control of it. Yep. You're in a relationship that you're not sure is good, then you come home one day and the other person says it's over. You gotta deal with it.
This path
will lead me to a life is not meant for me. I think the biggest regret in life, think the worst thing that could happen to any of us is to get to the end of our life and realize we missed it.
Sometimes that that brain comes in and I'm like, at the end of my life, looking back, what would I say to myself?
If you got to the end of your life and you realized you didn't make that decision, you didn't shift your mindset, you didn't say enough, you didn't decide to say no, or you didn't decide to say yes Mhmm. And you missed it.
And your maker played you a video of the person you could have been.
What would be your number one wish? What would be your wish? If you got to end of your life and realized you played small, and your maker said to you, alright, you got one wish, what would it be? To go back and To go back. And you know what I always say? Wish granted.
Wish granted. We're here.
Mhmm.
Let's start today. If you were there, you'd say, please let me go back. Boom. We're here. We're back. Let's go.
As a kid, I remember, I think I heard that in church. It's like, what are you doing when no one's watching? And it's so true. I mean, that follows you throughout your whole life.
It's it's the the the is Yes.
Right? If you think about it, you and I have talked about this. When people say their values or their character, let's use the word character. Character is really just who we are when no one's watching. Right? If you're on social media and you're like, I love my wife. You're amazing. Mhmm. But then I'm looking at DMs on the side in my Instagram of other pretty girls, then I'm full of crap. Mhmm. Right? Because nobody's watching.
Right? If I say, I love my partner Tony Robbins, and behind his back, I'm making side deals, then I'm really the side deal guy, or I'm really the guy that would be unfaithful. Like, we we really are. Our character is who we are when no one watching.
Question two.
How do you know the difference between pushing through resistance
and knowing it's time to pivot and start something new? There is this fine balance
of quitting too soon. Sometimes we don't realize that we don't recognize
the joy
of the lessons we learn from it from going deeper,
even in something we don't like. How you do one thing is how you do everything.
But what if you said, instead of I I shouldn't be here, I'm supposed to be doing this.
What if your brain said, oh,
this is just part of the journey. I have to do this in order to get there.
If you think to yourself, I'm not here forever, but while I'm here,
I'm gonna make everybody around me sick because I'm gonna love what I do. I'm gonna kick ass what I do. And when I'm at the peak of this, I'm gonna bail and go do my own thing.
If you're torturing yourself year after year of hating it, then just give yourself a deadline.
Right? I'm in this career that I don't like, or I'm in this relationship I don't like, and just say, hey, I'm going all in for six months. I'm gonna make it look like I like, they're not not gonna recognize me at my job because I'm gonna come in early, I'm gonna light it up, but I'm only here for six months. And in that six months, I'm gonna skip these five things, and I'm gonna spend the time launching my coaching program, or getting started with this new business,
clients, or getting my social media to go. And in six months from today, it's over. It's done. It's not a dabble. It's a commitment. Listen, I didn't quit.
I started with cars. I didn't quit doing cars until my real estate business made me more than the car business did. Then I quit, got out of the painting. Then I started educating people on how to invest in property like I do. I didn't quit.
I never quit investing, but I didn't I didn't quit it being my full time, and I didn't go all in on teaching people until the teaching business made more than the real estate business.
Okay. Number three. Is there a simple way someone can honestly evaluate whether what they're doing is actually moving them forward or they're just or just keeping them busy?
You
have to measure.
You have to keep score. Where was I three months ago? Where was I three weeks ago? And am I moving forward? Am I am I making progress? Doesn't mean not perfection, progress.
You have to measure what actually moves the needle. Don't measure
work.
Measure productivity
and moving towards the goal that you want.
You might be great at creating your coaching curriculum.
You might be great and go, I built the most beautiful thing and the most beautiful logo, and I have my 12 session coaching program. I went back and forth with Gigi or Chad or Claude. I dialed it in. It's freaking amazing.
I am making progress.
True. But when that's done, where's the part that you're holding back on? Letting people you know just start telling everybody that you are a coach now and you wanna do it. Starting to put on your social media.
You gotta measure the uncomfortable because sometimes our brain just goes, well, I built the curriculum. I built the site. I did the thing. I did that thing. I know my ideal client. I wanna do the thing. It's like, yeah. But did you put did you reach out anybody, make any calls, try to set an appointment to get your first hold
on a second. Right? You have to measure those things.
You gotta know if you're winning or losing, and you gotta measure
especially the areas that you've been hesitant on.
We're all uncomfortable when something is new.
It's okay to be uncomfortable. Just do the stuff
that you've been putting off.
Okay. Number four. What are you watching people make way too complicated that if they just simplified it, it would completely change their results?
Our brains love to make things complicated. Looking at all of it is what freaks you out. Like, I if I use if I use AI as an example, oh my god. If you go online for five minutes, click on one
AI training,
and then your algorithm knows that you clicked on one. Oh my goodness.
You will get served
a gazillion of them, and everyone makes you feel like you're stupid, fall behind,
never gonna catch up. I'm too old for this stuff. How does this work? I didn't grow up with technology.
Right? It's like, you all you gotta do is get a Mac mini and use Clawbot, and then it does the thing, and then you see all these breakdowns, and you plug it into your workflow. It works like six people. You're not doing it, you're dumb. If you are, you're cool. And you're like Yeah. Ah. And you start thinking of all these things you gotta do with AI, and it becomes so overwhelming.
Like anything in life,
chunk it down one clear path,
one step at a time, and then just overcome
one constraint
at a time.
One constraint at a time, one problem, one thing you have to overcome at a time. So if if you know I wanna get to, you know, it's kaizen, one step at a time. You know the end result, but you can't look at all of it at the same time. You know, it's why New Year's resolutions don't work. I'm gonna stop drinking soda. I'm gonna stop eating sugar. I'm gonna eat three good meals a day. I'm gonna increase my protein. I'm gonna work out five days a week. You look at all of it. By week two, you're like, I can't do all this shit. Give me a piece of bread and soda, please. But what if you just said, January.
January.
I'm gonna walk every other day.
That's it.
February,
I'm gonna walk every other day,
and I'm cutting out bread.
March, no bread, no sugar, walk every day.
April,
waits three days a week. So one piece at a time, one constraint at a time.
Okay. What are the two or three things you would tell them to go all in right now? We must truly
identify
the goal.
If you said, hey, I want ninety days, I think most of our brains say, what do I need to do for the next ninety days?
If I look what to do, because there's so much going on in our lives. So the thing I would do is pick one thing k. And then identify that goal down to the specifics.
So before you write the how,
you're gonna write two chapters, but more clarity. What what two chapters are you gonna write?
What is the outcome of those two chapters? How are people gonna feel after they read these two chapters?
I wanna be so proud of these chapters that they're the two best chapters I've ever written in my entire life. Mhmm. I'm just you know, and you hear me say that fuzzy targets don't get hit. Wanna I write two chapters. So what does that mean? Is it the first two, the last two, the middle two? Where are they gonna be in sequence? Then once you have this big goal that you stare at, the end in mind, then reverse engineer what you have to accomplish to make that happen.
So I realized we did this unconsciously
is you gotta give somebody a reason why they need to learn it in the first place deeper than just knowing it or just deeper than just being better at at business.
Yes. Number two,
once you have and embrace a purpose,
you need to overcome fear.
Is there a fear of going live and somebody judging you?
Is there a fear of screwing up? Oh my god. When I get my first client in the first coaching session, they think I'm stupid. They think I'm crazy. Fear.
When it comes to AI.
Oh my god. What if AI gets all the codes and starts World War three?
But when you have a deep enough purpose,
we can transform
that fear because you know where fear comes from? Just deciding what the meaning is.
If AI is the thing that could take your job and end the world, do you really wanna learn it? But what if you said, humans, as humans, we've invented a lot, and I'm going to have faith it's going go in the right direction.
You know they predict AI, especially when it comes to quantum AI, will cure cancer in the next three years because it's like having a gazillion, a million doctors working twenty four hours a day, seven days a week to solve it. We are gonna have so many medical breakthroughs.
We are gonna cure my kid's allergies.
All those things are coming. So I would just rather focus on
AI can make me more human because it can do the stuff I don't wanna do so I can spend more time with her and the kids. It's
gonna help cure cancer, and I think we're smart enough as humans that we'll put boundaries on it. I don't know if that's gonna come, but if I think about that, then I lose the fear and I wanna move forward. True?
I'm just gonna think AI is gonna shift my life, and it's gonna make everybody else better. Then the fear is gone. Then we get to the third part.
When you have a deep enough purpose,
and you're not scared, and then you realize if I don't change, you know, that that saying if I'm not climbing, I'm sliding. Yep. If I don't change, there's no way I can be significant.
There's no way I can impact other people's lives. There's no way I can turn this inner passion into something bigger. Change is scary,
but I'm gonna model proven practices. I'm gonna take one step at a time.
So if you think about that, my purpose is big enough. I shift the fear, and now I'm embracing change, turning resistance into momentum.
You gotta cut through the overwhelm and be able to see one
straight line, one focus. If you're helping people find romance again, find intimacy,
find themselves,
get over an illness, Whatever it is, you gotta have that one path with a one big outcome.