Anxiety is on the rise,
but anxiety itself is very natural.
And so people are like, I wanna get rid of my anxiety. And I'm like, no. You wanna get rid of certain aspects of your anxiety because anxiety is a natural response to fear,
into stress, into uncertainty,
and more specifically,
perceived threats.
Today, I'm gonna be talking about your anxiety and how to stop feeling so anxious about your anxiety. I'm gonna take you through the ultimate guide to beating your anxiety, and we're also gonna talk about why anxiety exists in the first place. And if you can understand
why anxiety exists and why it's in us, it makes it easier to work through it. And so, you know, I'm gonna give you evidence based strategies to overcome your anxiety.
And there was a a study that was done in the the Journal of Anxiety Disorders,
which has gotta be a really fun journal to read.
The Journal of Anxiety Disorders have found that anxiety has gone up over three hundred percent
over the numbers that they had pre pandemic levels.
And so anxiety is on the rise,
but anxiety itself is very natural.
And so people are like, I wanna get rid of my anxiety. And I'm like, no. You wanna get rid of certain aspects of your anxiety because anxiety is a natural response to fear into stress, into uncertainty,
and more specifically perceived
threats.
And so
if you have anxiety when you're walking down, like, you start getting a real anxious feeling when you're walking in the dark going through a
crowded,
dark room and you start getting anxious. Well, maybe that's something that's telling you you should be anxious so that you protect yourself. Or if you're going through a dark alley and you get anxious, that's a good thing.
But when you're anxious and feel anxiety when you're sitting in your house
watching TV or just
hanging out, probably not the best time to be anxious. There's nothing to really fear in that moment. And so it's a good thing for humans because what it is is it is our brain
projecting itself into the future
and then telling our body to prepare for some sort of possible threat.
So think about that for a second. Anxiety is our brain projecting into the future and telling our body, get ready.
So at the core of anxiety
is the thought of I am not safe.
Really, that's what it is. No matter what form of anxiety shows up, it's the thought of I'm not safe. I need to prepare my body for some sort of attack
or to be able to run or to be able to fight or to be able to freeze.
And so your safety in some way feels threatened,
believe it or not. And so the question is, what does it feel threatened by?
That's what you really need to figure out. You need to take a step back when you're feeling anxious and saying, like, where do I not feel safe right now? So if you get I'll give you a couple of examples. You get anxious about public speaking. It might show up in sweaty palms and your heart's racing,
and you start to think about, oh my gosh. This is this is I'm getting really anxious about this public speaking that I need to do. The fear behind it might be, I'm not safe because I might be humiliated,
or I have to give a a presentation at work. I'm not safe because
what if I screw up this presentation in public speaking, and then I get fired,
and then I lose my house, and then I go broke, and they live on the street. That's my safety being taken from me in some sort of way. So my body's preparing for some form of attack.
If you start to get real anxious
when you go out to social events,
it might be like, I'm not safe.
I may might say something wrong, or I might be rejected,
or I might be kicked out of the tribe, and so I don't feel safe. And so I I have this feeling of anxiety when I think about social events.
Maybe it's, uh, you were raised by a mother who, like, was really, really worried about health concerns.
And so, you know, you maybe get anxiety about your health, and so how it shows up is you're, like, excessively googling anytime your elbow hurts or something like that, and so you get body scans or you're doing frequent doctor visits all the time. And it might it was like, I'm not safe because there might be something wrong with me. There must be something wrong with me. I gotta make sure that anything that's wrong with me, I've gotta fix.
You know, maybe you you're you're getting really anxious about being late somewhere, so you're rushing, and you're frantic, and you're sweating, and your heart's racing, and you're irritable.
And it's like, I'm not safe because if I show up late,
nobody's gonna everyone's gonna see that I'm late. Others might think that I'm irresponsible, and then they might not wanna hang out with me. So once again, I'm getting kicked out of the tribe again in some sort of way.
Maybe
you're sitting at work and you're having a great day, you're just putting your stuff together and just writing your emails.
You're sitting there, and then bing, a notification from your boss
pops up, and it says, hey. Are you free today at four?
And you just get anxious immediately.
And you're like, oh my god. I'm not safe because I might get fired. There must be something that I did wrong.
Maybe they're downsizing. Maybe I'm not good enough in some sort of way. I can't lose my job because I gotta feed my children. I've gotta feed myself. I've gotta pay my mortgage.
Or maybe you're you're sitting there, and your your your phone buzzes, and it says, mom calling.
And you get all anxious. You get all tight. You're you're you can feel yourself starts getting anxious. And you're like, oh my god.
You know, I'm not safe. Maybe there's something going on with her. Maybe there's something going on with dad. I might have to deal with something stressful. Maybe she tells me that, you know, dad fell down the stairs. And it's like, there's all of these safety and these fears that are there. And so in some sort of way, when you have these anxious feelings, it's you feel like there's a threat in your environment in some sort of way.
But,
you know, it's good to have anxiety
when you need it, like I said, when you're walking through a dark alley to have those anxious feelings to prepare you just in case.
It's not good when it's, an everyday, all day kind of thing.
You know? Chronic anxiety
interferes with your daily life, and we need to address it, and it can be overcome.
That's the best part about it. Anxiety almost always
comes from your thoughts.
So, really, when we feel anxious, we need to take a step back and be like, what was I just thinking? And so we're gonna go over some research backed techniques to kind of help you overcome
that anxiety, those anxious thoughts, and to be able to pull your body out of that anxiety that that anxious feeling that you have. And so
when you look at anxiety, first off, the definition of anxiety itself is a feeling of unease
such as worry or fear that can range from mild to severe. It is normal and essential human emotion that serves as an adaptive response to danger
or challenges. That's the definition of anxiety. So let me say it one more time just so you can understand the actual definition.
It is a feeling of unease,
such as worry or fear, that can range from mild to severe, and it is normal and essential human emotion that serves as an adaptive response to danger or challenges.
See how we think that there's some sort of danger?
And so anxiety can show up in two different ways for you. It can be emotional symptoms,
worry, fear, irritability,
difficult concentrating,
restlessness.
It can be physical symptoms,
muscle tension, headaches,
sweating,
trembling,
rapid heartbeat, shortness of breath.
You can even have gastrointestinal issues.
So that's how it shows up in the body.
And so let me just show you a few ways that you can kind of
let it out of the body. Okay?
The first strategy is a relaxation
technique for reduction of your anxiety. You've heard me say it over and over and over again.
Deep breathing.
When your emotion is high, in some sort of way your logic is low, you're actually not thinking very well. And so when you're really anxious, you tap into your fight, flight, or freeze,
and that's where your animalistic
survive survival part of your brain turns on, and your thinking and processing
and executive
decision making turns off.
And so get yourself feeling a little bit better
by using the next few strategies where you can calm yourself back down so that you can think the right way so that you can realize that maybe it's not that much of a threat. So the first thing I always recommend is deep breathing, because
if I'm gonna sit there and go, oh my god. I'm anxious.
What was I just thinking? What am I fearing? Why do I not feel safe?
But, like, I'm not calmed down at this point, it's gonna make it really hard for me to think in a smart way. And so deep breathing exercises
help activate your body's relaxation response and in turn reduces your anxiety levels. And so it's real simple. I always recommend
five seconds in, ten seconds out,
and it slows your heart rate down. It releases more carbon dioxide from your body, and it lowers your stress levels. So as soon as you start to notice anxious feeling, immediately go back to the breath. The fastest way to change your state is to go back to your breath every single time. K? That's the first thing. You gotta deal with the body. You gotta calm it down.
Then we can start to talk about the thinking side of things and how to change it, which goes to strategy number two, which is something called cognitive restructuring.
It's a technique that involves identifying
and challenging
negative thought patterns or fears that are contributing to your anxiety.
Right? This is where you're gonna be like, well, what was I just thinking? I was thinking this. You know, email from my boss.
I'm definitely getting fired. It's like, well, hold on. Let me let me not just go down that road.
It might be, you know, we he wants to talk with me because I've been doing so well. Might be because of the fact that we have a presentation for a competitor,
uh, to, you know, beat a competitor out in a week or something like that. And so what you wanna do with cognitive restructuring, it's it's rooted in cognitive behavioral therapy,
and it's been shown to be effective with treating anxiety disorder specifically.
So the first thing you're gonna do is you're gonna identify your negative thoughts. That's the first step is to become aware of the negative thoughts that fuel your anxiety. Notice when you don't feel good,
become aware of how your body feels,
and, usually, you'll start to notice the anxiety inducing thoughts
after
you notice your body's reaction to it.
Most of the time, our anxiety
like, our thoughts around anxiety come under the conscious mind, the subconscious.
So it's like, bing, the email from the boss comes through.
Immediately,
it's like, almost immediately,
holy shit.
I feel anxious. I'm feeling all this anxiety. You don't even notice the thought that is in between the bing and the body,
but there's always some sort of thought.
And so you have to understand when you take a step back, when you do the breathing, and then you say, like, what was I just thinking? You'll usually start to notice the thought after that. You can usually start to use cognitive restructuring.
And so what you wanna do, that's the first step, to notice it and all that. And the second step is to challenge the negative thoughts. Once you identify the negative thoughts,
evaluate
the accuracy
of these thoughts.
Try alternative explanations. Try another perspective.
How valid
is your thought that is making you anxious?
You know, psychologists have found that 85
of what we worry about never happens.
Never.
Out of the remaining 15%,
only 3% of it happens the way that we think that it will. The other 12% of that 15% doesn't happen as bad as we think, which means 97%
of what we think and worry about
and have anxiety over and mull over and ruin our day, 97%
of it doesn't happen or turns out better than we think that it's going to.
And so it's like, how can I take a step back and use cognitive restructuring to challenge
the thought that is giving me anxiety?
So that's the second thing. And number three is to replace your negative thoughts. So after you challenge the negative thought, replace the negative thought with
a more balanced,
realistic thought
that can help you reduce your anxiety levels. Okay. I'm starting to notice I'm getting anxious. Why is that? It's because my boss just emailed me. What was I just thinking? What am I afraid of? Where do I not feel safe?
I feel like maybe my boss is gonna fire me. Okay.
Alright. Is that real? Am I actually gonna be fired? Probably not.
Is there possibly another explanation for why he's sending me an email about wanting to meet with me at 04:00 today?
Well,
actually, yeah, that does make sense because I was talking to him yesterday about x, y, and z, and maybe he wants to meet with me about it. Okay. That makes more sense. So that's strategy number two, use cognitive restructuring.
Strategy number three is to use something called exposure therapy.
So it's a proven technique that involves gradually
and systematically
confronting
whatever situations
your
situations or objects or thoughts that you fear until the anxiety
subsides in some sort of way. And so this process will help you learn that your fears,
most of the time, are pretty irrational,
and it allows you to start to tolerate the discomfort of those fears and the anxiety that you're starting to have. And so what you're gonna do is you're going to, first off, identify what's causing your anxiety.
This alone,
when you just are able to kind of shine a light on the actual fear or the limiting belief or the, quote, unquote, lack of safety that you're feeling, just being able to kind of put it into words and to identify it helps a lot of people feel less anxious. A lot of people feel
less anxious after they identify it, and people feel less anxious when they take a step back and they find out what they're anxious about, which is real funny because most people think they know what they're anxious about, but then they take a step back and they realize that they're not anxious about that thing. They're anxious about the way that they're perceiving that thing or the thoughts around that thing. And so you identify your anxiety inducing thoughts,
and that alone
in turn can make you feel less anxious. You think that it'll make you feel more anxious, but it actually makes you feel less anxious because you're like, oh, yeah. It's usually not that big of a deal, or it's less of a deal than you thought it was.
So
maybe you notice that you've had this, like, underlying feeling of anxiety all week long, and you don't know why. You're like, I've just been feeling it's Thursday, and I feel like I've been anxious the past four days. You're not really sure why. Okay. We'll take a step back, breathe,
realize that you felt anxious
Since what time? When did you start noticing your anxiety?
Oh, yeah. That's right.
Since I had the meeting with my boss on Monday, today's Thursday, and on Monday, he told me I'm gonna need to give a presentation for work in two weeks.
And I am terrified of public speaking,
and I'm even more terrified to do it in front of the entire company.
Okay. So that's the first thing is to identify
the anxious feeling, and then maybe I give myself gradual exposure
to this presentation.
And so that's why when you're doing public speaking and you have to give a presentation,
try to finish it and then practice it as many times you possibly can. You're trying to expose yourself to it. The same way if someone's, like, terrified of a snake, you don't wanna just take a snake and put it on their lap. But if you have them in one room
on the complete opposite side of the room and on the opposite side of the room, they have a snake, they might start to freak out. But if snake is in the box, it can't get out. They might start to freak out. They might start to freak out. Gradually,
their body will calm down.
Gradually, it'll calm down. You bring it a little bit closer. Gradually, the body will calm down. This is what exposure therapy is. So you can expose yourself to the thing that's making you anxious.
And so what you do is you finish your presentation, and what you're gonna do is you're gonna read it out loud maybe 10 times the first day. And then what you're gonna do is you're gonna go home, and the next day, you're gonna practice the entire presentation. You're gonna take your slides. You're gonna put it on your TV at home. You're gonna present it for nobody,
maybe your your children's teddy bears when everybody goes to sleep, and you're gonna go through the entire thing. Practice it in your living room with PowerPoint
10 times.
Okay. That's a little bit more exposure. Okay. I feel a little bit more confident about this. And then what I'm gonna do
is maybe the week before the presentation,
I'm gonna stay late at work one night after everybody leaves, and I'm gonna practice it in the room that I will be presenting.
And I'm just gonna practice it 10 times over and over and over again. And then the night before, I'm gonna be practicing it again, and I'm gonna come in early the day of, and I'm gonna practice it before anybody else gets there.
And what happens is I've had so much exposure to this presentation. By the time I actually give the presentation, I've already done it 50 times,
and I've done it multiple times in the room that I'm actually giving the presentation. The only difference now,
besides the fact that it's basically memorized, is that there's humans inside of the seats. This is what exposure therapy to your anxiety will look like,
and so that's really where where to help you. And so that's the the three tips to the three strategies to help you with it. Um, there's some simple lifestyle changes that I wanna give you guys to help you reduce your anxiety
that are just proven that you can do, if you have more anxiety, this is just ways to help. First thing is exercise regularly. Physical activity has been shown over and over and over again to reduce your anxiety by increasing your endorphins.
It promotes relaxation and improves your overall mood. And so regular exercise,
at least thirty minutes per day, can have really massive long term benefits on your anxiety
anxiety reduction.
That's the first thing. Second thing is your nutrition.
When you have a really good, well balanced nutrition,
it manages your anxiety as well. If you have too much coffee, it gives you more anxiety. If you have too much sugar, gives you more anxiety. If you eat too much, you know, bags of chips and shit food, it's gonna give you more anxiety. So try to eat more whole foods. Try to limit your caffeine. Try to limit your sugar. Try to stay hydrated.
Dehydration can actually increase
your anxiety levels.
So many people just don't drink enough water. Like, so many of your problems will be fixed if you just drink more water. Your anxiety,
your, you know, fat, you might have less fat if you end up doing it. You might have better bowel movements.
So stay hydrated. Drink less alcohol. That's another thing as well that will help you.
So that's number two. Pay attention to your nutrition. Number three, prioritize your sleep.
Sleep is really important. Uh, poor sleep can worsen your anxiety a lot. I don't know about you, but if I have a really bad night of sleep, sometimes I notice that I'm more anxious throughout the day. And so prioritize your sleep. Have some sort of regular sleep schedule. And then the fourth thing that is huge that I recommend that you guys do is spend less time on your phone, spend less time in front of your TVs. There's been study after study after study that has shown that people that spend more time in front of screens have more anxiety than those that don't. Put your phone away. Get away from your TV. Go for a walk in nature. Be around
people who you wanna spend time with. All of these things help with your anxiety as well. And so I just really think that it's important for you to understand that, first off, anxiety is not a bad thing.
Chronic anxiety is a bad thing. Anxiety is built into you for a reason.
It is a protection mechanism.
When it is happening when you're sitting at your desk at work, what is that protection mechanism trying to protect you from?
And then also to understand that anxiety is something that we can all work through. As long as it's not a chronic,
like, actual anxiety disorder
that is something that's happening inside of your brain
that is
incurable or whatever it might be. Usually, most of us are just anxious because of our thoughts and because it's just simple adjustments that we can make in our lives. And so that right there is the, uh, ultimate guide to stop feeling anxious about your anxiety.
So if you love this episode, please do me a favor. Share it on your Instagram stories and tag me in it. Rob Dial Jr, r o b d I a l j r. Um, there are many people, I'm sure, that follow you on all of your platforms that have anxiety, and I just wanna help them hopefully
be able to free themselves from that. So if you would do that, um, it's the best way of saying thank you for the podcast and putting it out there for you. And so if you do that, would greatly, greatly appreciate it so we can impact more people's lives. And with that, I'm gonna leave the same way leave you every single episode. Make it your mission to make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you, and I hope that you have an amazing day. Hey. Based off of you watching this video, YouTube thinks that this video right here is the best video for you to watch to help you learn and grow and improve yourself right now. So
click that.